The ability to pick yourself up after a set back is a good skill to have. Not just in your career, but also your life. It shows resiliency.

I’ve been thinking about this recently because people around me seem to be going through really tough times. They come to me for advice and all I can do is give them advice. I’m of the philosophy that doing something for others is not really going to help them–they have to be the one to act in order to move forward.

I think that’s the whole idea from the adage: “Give a man a fish, you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, you feed him for a lifetime.”

Unfortunately, bad stuff happens to people. That’s just a fact of life. The way you react to it shows others your character. I don’t like it when people complain about their life and act like there’s nothing they can do about it–especially people who have all the advantages that life gives them: skin color, money, education, etc. When you compare yourself to others who might be in a worse situation, there’s really no point in complaining, is there?

I do try to be sympathetic because sometimes there is the whole issue of mental illness, too. It’s hard to help someone in a depressive state. All we can do is be supportive and encouraging. That’s all we can do for them. Sometimes, though, it is not even a psychological problem but also a physiological problem. Many mental health issues are linked to problems in brain chemistry. In this situation, people need to get professional help. Our job is to encourage them to seek counseling and therapy, and even get the proper drugs to right themselves.

I, myself, try not to fall victim to these depressions because it’s not healthy, and frankly, a little bit self-indulgent. I also know that there is something I can always do to change my situation and I take comfort in that. I know I am resilient–and knowing that I can act to help myself is empowering. I don’t want to be a victim to any situation, whether it stems from a human mistake or from a natural disaster.

I hope that if I lose my job and all our money, I can still go out and find a new job and save up money again. I hope that if we’re hit with another powerful earthquake or typhoon, I can survive it and be able to pick up the pieces and rebuild. I hope that if I suffer a real mental breakdown, I can seek counseling and get help from people who will show me the way out. I hope that if I lose somebody precious to me, I will learn to live life without them, but keep their memories alive within me.

I hope that my friends and family know that I’ll be there for them if they need me, but I won’t be able to do everything for them, unfortunately. It’s up to them to pick themselves up and move forward. Experience teaches us resiliency. We have to just keep on getting up and dusting ourselves off. That’s the only way to build up the skill.

I’d like to think that if a tragedy befalls me, I will always pick myself up and keep on going, that I’ll still be able to live the best life I can. A tragedy is a battle scar. But, I’m speaking from the point of view of someone who hasn’t really experienced a terrible loss. I know that–so I sometimes feel like I shouldn’t be talking because I don’t really know what it’s like. I can only hope that if I do, I am going to be okay. I’ll deal with it, somehow.