I’ve been messing around with the layout of the website and I can’t stop. I’m fascinated by all of the things I can do. I didn’t realize that working on a blog can be so fun. I feel like I’m working like a professional web designer. I know I’m not, but the feeling is there. I’m enjoying myself immensely. I do apologize if it looks messy and disorganized. I think it’s all part of the process.
Still, though, that shouldn’t distract me from the whole purpose of writing this blog post. It’s work related so it has a lot to do with finances.
I had my contract meeting with the bosses last week and needless to say, there really wasn’t anything new to report–not with them anyways. I had low expectations going in. I asked for things that I knew they had no power to grant me. Is this true, though? I wonder.
However, there’s been some rumblings from my co-workers. People have left the company because of some dissatisfaction with the way we’re being run. We, as in the teachers. I’m not allowed to say much about how the company is run because I signed the contract stating that I am not allowed to share information about company proceedings–yada yada, but I think I’m allowed to express my feelings on a blog that nobody really reads.
And there you have it. Changes–I really feel like it’s time for me to change careers. I’m going to be forty this year and I have really nothing to show for it in terms of achievements with this company. I’m still part-time, but that’s the only thing that I really like about my job. I don’t want all the extra responsibilities with being full-time and in higher positions. I don’t want more of my precious time tied up working for someone else.
More and more, I’m feeling the pull to become free. But I feel stuck and can’t leave just yet.
When I did my ask at the meeting, my manager came back at me and and told me straight up that there’s nothing he could do. It’s just the nature of the job. Fair enough. But then he goes to to add that if that was something that I felt really strongly about, then maybe I should think about finding a different job.
After ten years of good service to the company, this is what I am told.
He does have a point, though. I acknowledge that. This is why I knew beforehand that the answer was going to be no.
What bothers me about the whole exchange was the swiftness of the reply. He didn’t even acknowledge that there might be options to think about. He could have said something about talking to the higher ups and see if someone could look into it. He didn’t even think there was a problem. It was just I was wrong for asking and I need to shut up or leave if I really didn’t like it.
Eventually, I will, though. But not at the moment. I’ve already planned my year on the income I will be getting from this job. I need to hang on a couple more years to be on more financially safe footing and then I’ll leave really. Plus, I’m also working on a lot of side hustles to help me get there.
In the end, this is a good slap to the face to remind me that I need to shake myself out of the rut I’ve dug myself into the last few years. I’ve been complacent so I need to really get my act together.
I’m choosing to stay for now. The company is very lucky to have me as an employee. I do good work and make my students, their parents, and the school staff happy and satisfied.
With that said, I’ve got my eye on the future and I need to press on doubly hard towards the goal of working for myself.